On this episode Chao and Tino talk about porn, white guys winning, and that one time someone ran into lil Ceaser.
If you don’t know what Airbnb is yet….
Please come back to the shore, and put the whiskey bottle down.
So I have been doing Airbnb for about 4 years now. And I must say I love it. Its way more fun than I can imagine. I mean showing people who are lost the way. Now that’s the American dream. And me and a lot of New Yorker’s have opened our arms. Most people you encounter are awesome, and pretty stoked about living right in the neighborhood as opposed to a fancy soulless hotel. I mean I like the ideas of hotels, but when you think about it, it’s just a big ass dorm room that is overpriced, cheesy and out of touch with the community. When you really think about it, outside of the jobs it provides, hotels are pretty much shit. Why am I paying so much again for shit?
But airbnb has changed that platform and gave you variety, now who doesn’t love VARIETY?
But once in a blue I do have a nightmare guest. But that’s life right? With variety there will always be one that sucks. And my latest one was a girl from Japan. She seemed super nice, seemed to be in good spirits about finding a place to live in New York. She was staying 13 days and staying alone. Oh my god alone is awesome. One person to accommodate are my faves. I’m not really a group kind of guy.
ARE YOU BAR ENTITLED??
It’s fair to say that some people when coming to a bar act as if they own the bar.
I have over the years met my fair share of bar gods, I mean people who walk in and everything must stop, and they must be entertained immediately. I mean in the mist of pure chaos this man/ woman walks in and throws their hands up in disbelief and I look over and think ” Really? you don’t see there is 250 people in here right now and if they are standing in front of bar then they are probably ahead of you?”
And guess what the answer is?
No one cares. Now there are rare moments when someone walks into a bar and they see I am busy as hell, and they wait till I look for them. This is my job so even when busy as hell I will eventually look up and catch your eyes and say “what can I get you?” and this guy/girl understands the position I am in and understands how much time I have for them. They are aware enough to know this is a bad time for a Manhattan, or a bad time for a simple old fashion. this is a simple bad time for any cocktail. This person then maybe laughs and says ” wow I see your busy, let me just get two coronas.” I than smile and grab them two coronas, and then if I have a comp tab I put them on it, shit I might even go in my tip bucket. Give them some money because they have just made my night. I now will remember these guys forever. They will never spend a lot of money with me again. And if they tip accordingly that first time that pretty much guarantees it.
I have spent $35 dollars in a week drinking at some of the top bars in NYC because I gave this gesture one time when a bartender was in the weeds. Now that $35 I spent is tips. I should have spent $120.
We all have seen phones grow from random toddlers on street corners, that people put quarters in to make a call. To grown adults who can walk around freely and make any decisions it wants. At the same time capable of making four decisions at once. Yay I’m an adult now. Im a cellphone. But that time we had before cellphones? Wow it was epic. I miss the days of responding when I got to a phone not these new days of my phone when responding with my whereabouts. Who didnt think having a pager Was cool. Remember dialing 1800 collect? Wait do you remember 1800 collect?
Or do you remember their competition? 1800 callatt
At one point and time the guys winning, were the ones you didn’t pay directly. You pretty much force someone to have a conversation with you that you didn’t feel like paying. We were all pieces of shit. “Hey I’m in jail but really I’m just down the block at a payphone, talk to me!” oh yeah “pay for it also?”
and guess what? We all were suckers. But now we are a new type of sucker. The cellphone sucker!
Boy do we love some cellphone. I must admit I am so addicted to the functions on this phone I can’t grasp not having access when I was 10. (I’m 30 by the way). Some kids after the Y2K were lucky enough to be 16 and have access to a Facebook account directly from their cell phone. Oh my god, you can swipe right on your dating app, post on your timeline, and watch the NFL package directly from your cellphone! You mean I don’t need a computer, a tv or a damn internet that’s connected by a wire to the wall? Sign me the fuck up. But is this shit good for you?
We are fucking addicted, we sit in front of these damn devices everyday blindly missing our lives. Blind and never living in the moment anymore. People try to swim with the damn things now?
When did you ever try to take your tv under water? never because tv is something that you do on dry land! And sorry your phone is the same thing. No one cares that you can swim and FaceTime. It’s funny because I tell people I cut my phone off for a few days and they lose their minds. They can’t understand why I put my phone down and didn’t look at it for any amount of time. Why would you not look at your phone? Your phone is Beyoncé, you don’t wanna look at Beyoncé? On this episode Chao discusses his phone annoyances, and how he deals with being black in Brooklyn.
Previously on the Cupachino Blog Episode 6 The Gamble
Comedy podcast Cupachino
“Do I have a problem or do I just love money?”
Some of us gamble for fun, and some of us gamble to make ends meet. Gambling is a way of life and to a gambler what sounds better than having money? Making more.
Comedy Podcast Cupachino
I have gambled and seen a grown man crying in the urinal because he went all in, and put his house up and I guess the casino said ” thanks, come back for a free room”. So at least he has that to look forward to. Its sad but its life. I once went to Atlantic City with a friend and witnessed her lose $60k in 3 days
she brushed it off. But my mind was spinning, I was in pure shock. ” how the fuck did you lose that much money?” Oh I remember betting $1500 a hand blind and not understanding anything. The guy watching the table was smiling because he saw the chips working for the casino. The dealer saw the chips working for the casino, I didn’t understand shit and guess what? I saw the chips working for the casino. “hey come back again, there’s a hotel for free waiting for you, even though you paid us today for about a year.” There is an edge in gambling and some people are good at that, but some of us suck at it like Michael Jordan sucked in 5th grade at basketball. People say Michael Jordan gambles too much. Why might that be? Is it because he can’t dunk no more so he prefers the chip throw? gambling can be super competitive. Thats what makes the edge possible. We now can beat a mere mortal as opposed to beating a machine ( Casino). Remember you can’t beat a casino, ask Phil Ivey and then see how far that takes you. Its gambling when you have a edge yes every woman I have dated! You guys are all right! but its not as bad as everyday just randomly spending on numbers. So should we gamble? On this episode of Cupachino Chao and Tino talk about gambling in life.
Previously on the Cupachino Blog Episode 5 Sexual Endeavors
Comedy Podcast Cupachino
On this episode Chao and Tino rant about the eclipse, arcade video games, sex, and asking your friends dumb shit!
Previously on Cupachino Episode 4 Auditions and Extra Work
On this episode Chao and Tino talk extra work, auditioning and trying to become actors.
Previously on Cupachino Episode 3 Bombing on Stage
So many people wanna be in show business and leave their small town in hopes that New York City Or LA is the place to be. And guess what? They realize when you they get here that there are a million people that’s competing for the same type! How do you separate from the pact? It’s a hustle to get a job and its even more of a hustle to get an audition let alone get a call back. Often we as aspiring actors go to the drawing board and decide hey we need a check, so we choose to be background in movies. Why not? You get to act still. Well the character might be in the back of a shot just walking, or maybe just sitting, or even having a pretend conversation. This style of acting goes overlooked but is also tiring with long hours for little pay. On this upcoming episode of Cupachino we will discuss the times when we made this sacrifice.